Life – An Update

Imma gonna start by saying that the title ‘Life – An Update’ took me a good 20 minutes of brain yoga to come up with.

Imma gonna continue by saying that writing this is scary.  Is making me scared.  Is taking bravery.  This voice of words has been quiet for some time now and is a little croaky and wobbly.  And self-conscious.  But here goes.

Imagine you have two weeks off work.  Fourteen whole days to do with what you will.  As a freelancer, this happens every now and again.  Being ‘between jobs’ or ‘taking a break’.  Sometimes it’s by choice, sometimes it is not.  For me it always feels a little unnerving and a lot welcome.  Time is such a precious thing.  Time to create and be and imagine, is like gold.  Gold in a sea of gold-starved pirates.

But friends, gold must be used wisely.  Or, when suddenly it is gone, all you are left with is an echoing, wooden chest and a bunch of moody guys with eye patches.

If time is gold, then for the last two weeks I have been chucking it out of the car window.  Drive-by style.  With the abandon of someone who owns an orchard of gold laden trees.  Worst pirate ever.

The more time I throw away, the more it seems that everyone else is so good at using theirs.  Projects, massive workloads, side projects, launching projects, new projects, finishing projects, collaborative projects, projects.  I have never felt the need to create more than right now.  And I have never created less than right now.  What the heck?

Where are my projects?

What are my projects?

Projects!

On the other side of Goldgate is a feeling of joy at taking things slow.  Taking the day at the pace of a Victorian lady.  How things used to be.  Going against the grain of speed in a city of speedsters.  Just me and the housewives, swanning around, drinking coffee and planning dinner.

I am not proud of my time littering, not at all.  I am disappointed by it and frozen by it and ashamed of it.  But I am in the process of figuring out how to be a better pirate.  Turn that gold into something good.  Coming back here feels like a really great start.

 

*Update: Less than a minute after publishing this post I received a call about a really rad project.  Life, you tricksy pony.

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