Five Things:

To Cure the Monday Blues.  Tried and Tested yesterday.

Buy Yourself Flowers

Go Swimming

Redecorate

Colour Co-Ordinate Things

Eat Sea Food

(This Photo was taken in Thailand in January.  Prawns the size of your head. Although even fish fingers will do.)

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I do. And so do two billion others.

When my friend, Lauren, was a little girl she told her Mom that she wished that princesses were real and not just in fairy tales.  She was absolutely delighted when her Mom told her that they were and showed her pictures of Princess Diana on her wedding day.  Little lauren told me this story while we stood on a crowded street in Thailand surrounded by smartly dressed Thai school children, all waiting for the Prince and Princess of Thailand to arrive for the opening ceremony of a temple.  They drove past in an old car and the Princess waved and smiled.  She looked graceful and magical, everything a princess should be.

I love the suspension of disbelief of a Royal Wedding.  Before and after dissolve away.  We glimpse royalty and it at once feels more mystical yet more tangible than ever.  Ameezing.

[Photo from The Guardian]

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Fancy Pants

I’m not a big quote a quote kind of gal, but this one made me stop and ponder a little longer.

The ordinary acts we practice every day at home are of more importance to the soul than their simplicity might suggest. -Thomas Moore

(Photo taken in Thailand)

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Bon Voyage

The summer holidays already feel like eons ago.  I thought I’d defibrillate them back to life one last time with a final Thailand post.  Here are a few moments of Thailand that feel so holidays, Summer and well, Thailand.

The postbox says 'Bangkok' and 'Other Places'

Beach Rubbish Bin

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Signs

When you’re travelling in a country whose language you don’t speak, read or write, words looks like unfamiliar squiggles, sentences look like a series of unfamiliar squiggles and signs, even the seemingly mundane ones,  sometimes look like modern art.  After a while even signs in your own language start to look surreal.  Here are a few of my favourite moments of illiteracy and English that made me look a little longer.

Made of straws

Tuk Tuk

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Ouch…

A ticket to Thailand for your birthday:  Unbelievable

Two weeks in Thailand:  Incredible

A trip to the dentist costing the same as two weeks in Thailand:  Priceless

Also, my dentist has excellently groomed nostrils and gives you headphones.  Having your teeth drilled to a soundtrack of classical music is a completely surreal experience.

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People of Thailand

Man with Hat

Man with Hat's Foot

 

 

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Dum Dum Tsshh…

This is my favourite joke of all time:

Q:  What’s white and sweet and swings from tree to tree?

A:  A meringue-atang

In Thailand I discovered my second favourite joke of all time:

Q:  How do you kill a circus?

A:  Go for the Juggler

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Of Exotic fish and Gynaecologists

Racing across the South China sea in a speedboat to go snorkeling in an ocean that “probably doesn’t have any sharks” and if it does they’re “pretty small” is a lot like going to the gynaecologist.  Exotic fish watching and lady part check-ups are both activities for good causes.   And both, in my head at least, are weirdly linked.

Wait, don’t page back to facebook, I can explain.  Sometimes the only way I can summon courage to do things that scare me (like jumping into the murky ocean in the middle of nowhere feeling vaguely like a baby seal with swimming disabilities) is to think of the gynaecologist.  Mine is a very nice man in his sixties who looks like he recycles and never forgets his wife’s birthday.  His office is wallpapered with photos of smiling babies, tired looking moms and loads of thank you cards. Whenever I go there I take solace in the fact the I am not the first or last patient he has seen.  Infact I am one of thousands and thousands that he will see in his career, just another in a line of anothers.  Back to the ocean, our speedboat is just another speedboat in the ocean, heck, sharks probably yawn at the sight of speedboats by now.  Yes, bad things do happen, but generally, that moment that makes your heart pound will not make headlines. And that for me is a super comforting thought.

With Dr Smith’s office in mind, I jump into the water, flippers and all.  My heart does pound and I have to hold Aadil’s hand for most of the time (knight in shining goggles that he was), but geez it’s totally worth it. We snorkel near three different islands in one afternoon (our speedboat driver lives up to his name of Speedboat Driver).  As we are heading home, all salty haired and sun-kissed he says to us, “We go to fish farm now, see sharks, yes?”  We all chuckle in the way you do when there is a joke being made that you don’t quite understand.  And yet, suddenly we’re stepping off the speedboat in the middle of the sea onto rickety planks of wood floating on blue plastic drums all tied together with sun bleached ropes that form a grid.  In each wooden square is a net housing different kinds of fish, turtles and um, sharks.  Not more than a metre long but still big enough to nibble off an elbow or an ear at least.  Ah, the fish farm.

There I stood, holding a little plastic packet of bloody, dead sardines (shark food), balancing on a floating plank of wood narrower than a ruler but older than my granny, looking down into the water at circling sharks, whose bellies are hopefully already full of elbows and ears, thinking about my gynaecologist, listening to the sound of my heart pounding like a cliché and smiling.

Fish Farm

Knight in Shining Goggles

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One Night in Bangkok

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